


The Presentation of Porn

by KissTheDream



Category: Infinite (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Office, Boss/Employee Relationship, Crack, Funny, Humor, M/M, Office Sex, Sexual Content, Sexual Humor, Silly Little Crackfic, Smut, Yaoi, office life, what is this
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-21
Updated: 2015-10-21
Packaged: 2018-04-27 11:38:42
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,145
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5047081
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KissTheDream/pseuds/KissTheDream
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Boss Kim Sunggyu, the Absolute Ruler of the Office and the Universe, has a presentation coming next week where he’s supposed to present the results of his department in front of all the higher-ups. But Sunggyu is a little busy banging Woohyun on his desk, so it falls down to Sungjong to write the damn presentation, on top of everything else Kim Sunggyu was already making him do, like pick up his packages from ebay at the post (Sungjong once peered into one of those packages and was greeted by the biggest dildo he had ever seen in his twenty-two years of life. He never touched Sunggyu’s packages again). Realizing he will never be able to get the presentation done on time, since Kim Sunggyu hadn’t deigned to tell him about it until the day before, Sungjong goes to beg Myungsoo the computer whizz to patch something up.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Presentation of Porn

 

**THE PRESENTATION OF PORN**

 

“So… when do you get off work?” asks Myungsoo. He’s pocking the cream on his coffee as if expecting a wild alligator to suddenly emerge from beneath it. Sometimes Myungsoo is just so damn  _weird._

“Get  _off work_?” Across the table of the office cafeteria, Sungjong has his pink head buried in his hands. “I  _never_  get  _off work,_  Myungsoo. When I’m done in the office I have to pick up his packages at the post and answer those emails he got from the Yansang corporation, and then drive all the way to Daegu to give his parents Chuseok gifts.  _Chuseok gifts!_  Not to mention, I have to buy those before the mall closes.”

_His_  means  _Kim_   _Sunggyu’s,_ of course. Everyone knows the boss is overworking the young intern, but no one really cares enough to do anything about it. No one wants a fight with Kim Sunggyu, the self-proclaimed god of the office, Seoul and the galaxy.

Truthfully, there are even more things Sungjong has to do for Sunggyu today, like buy his groceries and take them to his house, but the intern doesn’t want to bore Myungsoo to death with his complaining. Even though he’s weird, Myungsoo is the only person in the whole building who doesn’t treat the intern like a maid (in the best case) or a punching bag (in the worst).

Myungsoo sighs and pokes his coffee once again.  _Is he even going to drink it?_ The coffee must have gone cold already. Myungsoo doesn’t seem to care. It seems like he bought it just to play with it. “Well, he  _has_ to let you sleep, at least.”

It’s Sungjong’s turn to sigh. “I wish that were true. I don’t think I’m even going to go home tonight. I have so much to do, and I live in Bucheon. As soon as I’d get home, I’d have to head out again!” He throws an angry glance across the hall, at his-majesty-Kim-Sunggyu, the person who’s the sole cause of all his stress. But Sunggyu doesn’t even notice. He’s laughing at something Woohyun said as if it was the funniest joke humankind had ever come up with. Seeing Sunggyu having so much fun makes Sungjong even more angry.  _He always says he’s tired, but from what? Breathing? Fucking Woohyun? Being an asshole?_

“Hey, you know, I live just around the corner.” Myungsoo has a strange smile on, the one that shows off his dimples. Honestly, Sungjong doesn’t really see how Myungsoo’s statement is relevant to Sunggyu being a dick. “Oh. Cool.”

Myungsoo stares hard into his coffee, chewing on his lip. “Well, uhm, you could sleep over at my place.” He looks up at Sungjong, then just returns to having a staring contest with his coffee.

Sungjong thinks it must be all that porn that made Myungsoo extremely awkward in real romantic situations. Although he feels for him, Sungjong doesn’t exactly want to be a guinea pig for Myungsoo to try out on everything he had seen in porn. He’s got a feeling he won’t be able to walk the next day, and then Sunggyu will most likely hit him with newspapers for not bringing him his morning latte, while Woohyun will just blatantly laugh at him from the safety of Sunggyu’s lap.

Not a very good way to start your day.

“Thanks, but I’m good.”

 

 

* * * * *

 

The papers in his arms are flying all over the place and the two lattes (one for Sunggyu, one for Woohyun; Sungjong spit in both, like he did every morning) in his hands are dangerously close to spilling as Sungjong rushes through the hallway towards the boss’ office. Sunggyu phoned him a minute before, yelling that it was urgent and that Sungjong better teleport to his office ASAP if he wants to keep his internship. Sungjong isn’t even sure he  _wants_  to keep his internship anymore, but finds himself in front of Sunggyu’s door nonetheless. He’s so out of breath his lungs hurt.

“Sunggyu-nim?“ he calls at the door.

No one answers. He knocks again.

Still nothing.

“Sunggyu-nim?” he tries one last time, before finally opening the door.

“What the- AGH, EWWW!!!”

Woohyun is flat on his back on Sunggyu’s desk, among the scattered papers and the pens, knees jerked up almost up to his head. His shirt is still in place but his pants (and underwear) are nowhere to be found. Lips quivering, he whimpers loudly while Sunggyu lazily slides three fingers into him, licking them after he pulls them out.

That’s when they notice Sungjong.

“YAH, LEE SUNGJONG!!!” both scream at the same time.

“Wha- what the hell do you think you’re doing?!” yelps Woohyun, voice noticeably trembling, frantically trying to cover himself with nearby papers.

“You wanna die? Can’t you see I’m busy?!” yells Sunggyu at the intern.

Sungjong cannot believe his own ears. “B-but you called me here! You said it was urgent-!!”

Woohyun rolls his eyes. “Can’t you at least close the door behind you?” He’s still clutching sales reports to his private parts, as if Sungjong hasn’t already seen everything.

“What do you want?” demands Sunggyu, eyes still roaming Woohyun’s body.

“What do I want?” repeats Sungjong, confused. “You said you wanted to see me… so here I am.”

Sunggyu looks puzzled for one long moment.

“Oh, right, the presentation!” Sunggyu remembers. “You’ll fix that up for me, right?”

“… Excuse me?”

Sunggyu sighs. “Do you even have a brain under that pink hair? I’ve got a video presentation for tomorrow… sales or something. You can finish that in time, can’t you?”

Sungjong just blinks. Sunggyu has asked him to do a lot of ridiculous things over the months (like buy his parents Chuseok gifts) but this is getting really bizarre. “A presentation for  _tomorrow_?” There’s  _no way_  Sungjong can get any more work done by tomorrow. “What topic?”

“I told you, sales or something.” Sunggyu seems to have decided Sungjong was taking too much of his time – time that he could spend fucking Woohyun - and leans over to suck on Woohyun’s neck. Sungjong tries to look away, but the sight is hypnotizing as much as it is disgusting. “Oh, and the board of directors will be attending, so make sure the presentation’s nothing less than perfect.” says Sunggyu in between wet kisses.

Sungjong feels panic bubble in his guts. Is Sunggyu for real? A presentation for  _tomorrow? Nothing less than perfect?!_  “B-but boss, how am I supposed t-”

But then Woohyun seems to have overcome his momentary shyness. In the blink of an eye the papers are thrown aside and the two start getting back to where they stopped before. Woohyun suddenly slides his long, pale legs around Sunggyu’s waist and pulls the boss down with him, so that they’re on top of each other on Sunggyu’s desk. A few pens, a table calendar and a lamp all fall down onto the floor.

“Fine.” says Sungjong bitterly, knowing no one’s listening to him anymore. “Asshole.” he whispers as he awkwardly exits the office. Even halfway down the hallway, he can still hear Sunggyu moaning, Woohyun urging him on with the dirtiest words Sungjong’s ears have ever heard, and the desk grinding against the office floor.

_Tomorrow, I won’t spit in your lattes. I’ll poison them._  promises Sungjong to himself.

 

 

*** * * * ***

 

“Hey, Myungsoo!” yells Sungjong the moment he descends the stairs and finds himself in the relative safety of the ground floor office. At least no one is fucking here. “Myungsoo!!!”

If there’s a person who can help Sungjong right now, it’s Myungsoo. Being good with computers, Myungsoo can probably conjure up an entire presentation within fifteen minutes. For Sungjong, it would take  _hours_  – hours that he doesn’t have. “Myungsoo, can you please-”

But Myungsoo seems occupied at the moment. Lee Howon, the company’s PR specialist, is casually sitting at the side of Myungsoo’s desk, sipping a frappuccino and explaining something to Myungsoo. “You know, the kind of things I like. I’m too lazy to look it up at home and I can’t use the company computer, so…”

“Sure thing.” says Myungsoo with a mischievous smile. “The usual stuff?”

Howon then uses some weird terms, of which Sungjong recognizes only ‘bondage’ and ‘hardcore’.

Myungsoo grinns. “Don’t worry, I know all your kinks. I’ll find you something hot. I’ll give you a USB tomorrow.”

“Great,” says Howon. “Just so you know, I’m getting off work early today, and I won’t be here tomorrow either.” There’s a tug at the corner of his lips, the closest Howon ever got to a genuine smile. “I have a feeling I’ll be sick tomorrow. So give it to me the day after, ‘kay?”

Sungjong isn’t quite sure how Myungsoo knows all about Howon’s sexual preferences. He isn’t very curious right now, either. “Myungsoo, can I talk to you?”

“Sure.” says Myungso with the sweetest smile in the universe. It is almost inconceivable that the owner of that innocent smile has discussed hardcore porn mere seconds prior. Myungsoo seems slightly embarrassed, though, so Sungjong decides to quickly get to the point.

“I need a video presenation, Myung, and fast.” Sungjong glances around, just to make sure Kim Sunggyu is still upstairs. Sometimes his boss seems to miraculously teleport next to him whenever Sungjong is about to curse him. “ _That asshole_  has to present  _tomorrow_  at the board. I can’t possibly finish a presentation in time, and if I don’t he’ll make me into a pink-haired corpse!”

Myungsoo looks just as confused as Sungjong did when he first heard about the presentation from Sunggyu. “What, by tomorrow? On what subject?”

“ _Sales or something_ ”, quotes Sungjong mockingly. “I don’t know what that means any more than you do.”

Myungsoo bites his lips, staring somewhere into the distance for a second. “I think – yeah, it should be that.”

“What?” asks Sungjong eagerly.

“The board usually has a meeting at this time of year,” says Myungsoo. “They present their department’s progress, their plans for next year, blah blah blah. I guess that’s what the boss meant.”

Sungjong rolls his eyes. “I just don’t get it! He’s the boss, and  _you_ know more about his own job than he does!”

Myungsoo chuckles quietly at that.

“Can you do it by tomorrow?” asks Sungjong anxiously. “Please, just this once. Before Sunggyu makes strawberry pudding out of me!”

Myungsoo gives it a second’s thought, a small glint brightening his eyes. “Okay.”

“Really?!” exclaims Sungjong. They’re office mates, sure, but Sungjong didn’t think their relationship is close enough for Myungsoo to go this far just to help him out.  _If Myungsoo does the presentation, I might even get an hour of sleep tonight!_ He’s so happy he finds himself hugging Myungsoo tightly.

Myungsoo giggles into his hair, drawing his hands through the pink strands. “I have a condition, though.”

Hands still around Myungsoo’s shoulders, Sungjong feels his own face going pale.

“My place really  _is_ around the corner,” Myungsoo says. “Just tonight, okay?”

 

 

*** * * * ***

 

Myungsoo’s house is strangely empty. His furniture is new and the rooms are clean and Myungsoo’s artsy photographs (he had taken those himself) are on each wall, but there is a lingering sense of emptiness.

“I live alone.” Myungsoo explains before Sungjong can even ask. “That’s why it’s a bit…” he trails off. Myungsoo seems to be suddenly lost in thoughts, and Sungjong isn’t sure of the reason. “Are you okay?” Sungjong asks.

“Huh? Of course,” Myungsoo says with his signature dimple smile.

“Well then,” Sungjong says, “let’s get on with it.”

Sungjong’s clothes quickly fall onto the floor, and Myungsoo’s eyes grow wide.

 

 

*** * * * ***

 

The large conference hall, dusty and seldom-used, is full of black suits and the clatter of heels on marble. The big shots of the company are all there, leaning back in the first-row seats and clutching glasses of fine champagne. At first, it seems more of a high-class party than a company meeting, but when the presentations start the atmosphere grows serious. Although those people in the front row have laughed and chatted and drank, work is what they are really here for. Work is all they know.

The first few presentations are long and boring, an endless string of reports and data and empty words of future improvement and striving to be better. The only fun presenter turns out to be Dongwoo, head of the marketing department. He almost falls off the podium while climbing it, unconsciously kicks the mic stand the entire time ( _almost like Sunggyu kicks me,_ thinks Sungjong) and laughs out loud at random places during his own presentation. Sungjong wishes there were more presenters like him, even though he didn’t get the faintest clue about the marketing department’s progress from Dongwoo’s presentation.

And then it’s Sunggyu’s turn.

From the way Sunggyu climbs the podium, all confident and with a charming smile, you’d never guess he has no idea what he is about to talk about. Even his appearance is on-point, since he’s wearing a beautiful dark red suit that is gorgeous enough to make the higher-ups forget that the dress code for the conference is strictly black-and-white. Sunggyu greets the audience politely, nodding in each of his boss’ directions, before beginning his introduction.

Sungjong simply can’t, for the life of him, understand what Sunggyu is saying. He is using terms Sungjong never heard of before and constructs sentences that are long and elaborate but have no real meaning, as far as Sungjong can see. But it all sounds so damn smart, and Sunggyu is so ridiculously calm and charismatic, Sungjong finds himself eagerly listening even though he knows for a fact that it’s all bullshit. Not to mention Sunggyu has his nicest smile on the entire time, something Sungjong doesn’t get to see very often. He catches himself thinking that, was Sunggyu not a complete asshole, he might have fallen for him.

Only the introduction is over, but the audience is already clapping enthusiastically. From his seat at the side, Sungjong can see all the important people in the front row whisper to each other words of praise for Kim Sunggyu, the brilliant young director of the sales department.

Sunggyu himself isn’t deaf to the reactions either. He bites his lips to stop himself from grinning, then pushes the button to turn on the video.

No matter how many years will pass, Sungjong will never be able to forget the look on Sunggyu’s face when the video starts, showing a dark room with a bed, and a naked Japanese guy tried to a chair, while three others lick every single part of his body and the fourth starts dripping hot vax onto his chest.

 

 

*** * * * ***

 

The next day, the usually rowdy ground-floor office is strangely quiet. You can almost touch the tension in the air, and the reason is Kim Sunggyu, who has apparently decided to come down to the lower office that day. Presently he’s sitting at Lee Howon’s usual desk, since the PR is missing for the second day in a row.

No one even dares talk to Sunggyu. Leaning back in Howon’s seat, Sunggyu’s tiny eyes are glaring murderously whenever someone moves or coughs or just breathes a little too loudly. Sunggyu himself, on the other hand, is loudly twisting a stack of papers in his hands as if imagining it was someone’s neck and sometimes threateningly clicking the stapler, as if to say “If I find out who did this, they’ll be dead for sure.”

Sungjong is already being punished for his fault in Sunggyu’s embarrassing “porn presentation”, and is now writing Christmas cards for every niece and nephew of Sunggyu’s, with obligatory cheesy wishes and hearts and smiles. Sungjong doesn’t feel as bad about his punishment as he might since he likes kids a lot. He hopes Sunggyu’s little relatives have somehow avoided his genes.

What Sungjong is worried about the most is what will happen to Myungsoo if Sunggyu finds out about Myungsoo mixing up Howon’s and Sungjong’s USBs being the reason he got humiliated in front of the entire company. Sunggyu is clearly looking for another person to blame, since just punishing Sungjong is so easy and ordinary it doesn’t satisfy his anger at all. Thankfully, Myungsoo has enough sense to keep his head down and type away on his laptop as if he has nothing to do with Sunggyu’s public humiliation.

Right when it seems like the atmosphere in the office cannot not get any worse, Lee Howon causally barges through the door.

“Yo.” he mutters to Sungjong, Myungsoo and Woohyun, then apologizes to the boss for being late and MIA for the past two days (“I am very sorry. Sunggyu-nim. My mother was hospitalized yesterday morning and is still not feeling well…”) and drags a chair to sit with Myungsoo, since Sunggyu has assumed his place. In his usual tactless manner, Howon doesn’t even realize the atmosphere is a little odd. And why would he? Since he was absent the day before, he hasn’t even seen Sunggyu’s “unconventional” presentation.

When the lunch break arrives at last, Sungjong is looking forward to sitting in the cafeteria with Myungsoo and finally laughing his ass off at Sunggyu’s disaster. Even though his night with Myungsoo was very awkward, and he could see Myungsoo was holding back on all the weird things he had seen in porn and would love to try out, somehow the awkward experience brought them closer.

But as soon as he sees Myungsoo in the cafeteria, his heart sinks. His Majesty Kim Sunggyu, the one who never eats with the rest and demands that food be brought into his office, is sitting by himself right behind their table, sulking like a child and glaring murderously over his coffee as the intern hesitantly sits across Myungsoo.

“So,” starts Myungsoo awkwardly, uncomfortably aware of Sunggyu listening to every word spoken.  “Uhm, how was your day? Was your first shift, uh, productive?”

Sungjong is just about to reply when Lee Howon, with his usual awful timing, strides up to them.

“Yah, Kim Myungsoo!”

Myungsoo turns around in surprise. Howon seems quite annoyed, and puzzled.

“Hey, what the hell is up with that USB you gave me? I thought you said something like  _oh don’t worry, I know all your kinks._  Since when is a presentation on sales one of my kinks? Who would get a boner from that?!”

Both Sungjong and Myungsoo are desperately flailing their arms around and signaling Howon to  _shut the fuck up_ , but it’s already too late. At the table behind them, Sunggyu suddenly chokes on his coffee, then stands up with a massive crash of his chair.

Myungsoo yelps and hides behind Howon and Sungjong while Sunggyu seems to grow as large as he is furious. Sungjong can swear his boss is now twice his usual size, and his tiny eyes seem to be turning blood-red.

“KIM MYUNGSOO!!!!!!!!!”

 

 

 

**\- THE END-**

 


End file.
